Honey-Do List

Happy Tuesday everyone!  Time has been flying by here at the Farris household and we’re attempting to get some of the “honey do” items checked off the list!  I finally convinced Scott to let us get a new couch.  This was about 1 year in the making.  While the couch isn’t as awesome as our old one (no chase lounge) it does smell nice, the pillows stand up, and it’s not torn up by the dog.  We are also finally replacing the scratched up doors and crown molding around the house.  Next on our agenda is painting.  Don’t worry, we outsource all our work- the hardest part is picking out a color.

 

A few weeks ago I had a mini girls night out – Me, KTP, and Lee went to a charity event call The White Party.  Since KTP’s bachelorette party was previously planned for that night, we decided to call it Katie’s Freedom Party.  It was a success.

Scott’s 28^th birthday was last week!  He celebrated with a family birthday dinner and a golf outing to FarmLinks with 5 of his buddies. His big gift this year from the family was a new Apple computer.  This is our first Apple product (not including ipods).  It’s a bit of a learning curve but I still believe Apples are overpriced and overly confident.  Besides those two little facts, the computer is great.

 

Also, a big shout out to my best friend, Taylor- HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!  She is spending her birthday working up in DC.  I kinda feel sorry for her-mainly bc it sucks celebrating a birthday away from home, but then I remember that last week she was chillin’ at St. Kitts Island- relaxing, fishing, and enjoying the most beautiful beaches God made—and then I don’t really feel sorry for her anymore.  I’d trade lives with her any day.

 

William is a UFO?

As many of you know, my nephew, William, is the cutest kid in the world (although I'm probably a bit bias).  Sometimes, he can be mistaken for  a thug, Olympic swimmer, Denis the Menace, or Lloyd Christmas...until now....William might be a UFO.  Yes, that's right, William could be related to my childhood hero, E.T Phone Home.  Here is the proof- You decide.

You can't deny the similarity

Either way, William and his father, John, both have "unique" hair (and facial expressions)

Thug for Life

As many of you know, looks are deceiving.  This is especially true with me.  While outwardly I look like an average Jane (no pun intended), deep down, I’m gangster.  Yup, true story.  When I was a kid, I dreamed of getting cornrows in my hair with hot pink big barrettes, I know all the lyrics of Gangsters Paradise, and I hail from the projects of East Tennessee.

With that said, I know my fair share of rap music.  On my way home yesterday, a song came on 95.7 Jamz, and I actually listened to the lyrics….which made me burst out laughing.  I have complied a few of my all time favorite rap lyrics that, when taken out of the song, are pretty interesting. 

·         “How can I maintain, with mad shit on my brain?”  –Ruff Ryders’ Anthem by DMX.  Because mad shit is always on the brain.

·         “Brenda, LaTisha, Linda, Felicia, Dawn, LaShaun, Ines Alicia, Teresa, Monica…ect” What These B** Want by DMX.  The name list when on and on-there comes a point where bragging turns into an STD.

·         “I'm a BET soldier and MTV gangsta, I will be on VH1 when I'm done bein famous” – Lil’ Wayne.  Speaking the truth- his next appearance will be on Celebrity Rehab.

·         "I keep it O.G. watching episodes of O.C." – Brand New by Living Legends.  Even gangsters watch the OC.

·         “I’m a venereal disease like a menstrual bleed…” – Lil’ Wayne.  Why would anyone call themselves this?

·         “Address me as your highness, high as United, 30,000 feet up and you are not invited” – So Appalled by Kanye West.   Noone can explain what comes out of Kanye's mouth.

·         “Feels like a midget is hanging from my neckless” – Stand Up by Ludacris.  Say what?

·         “I’m so cheesy ho my swag got high cholesterol” – All of the Lights by Childish Gambino.  Serious disease-no joking matter.

·         “Green got cheese like a nacho, if you ain’t got no a$$ beotch, wear a poncho” Rack City by Tyga.  This explains the recent tunic trend.

·         “You should make your own toilet tissue, since you the shit” – Duces by Kanye West.  A new way of making toilet tissue.  Hope Kleenex doesn’t catch on…

Ok so that’s my top 10 weird/funny lyrics from a rap song.  The list could go on to about 50, but I decided to spare y’all.  I challenge all 5 of my blog followers to use one of the quotes today during conversation.  Also, Happy Chick Fil A Appreciation Day!  I think there should be an Examiner Appreciation Day, where all the bankers come together and bring us lunch…I’ll keep dreaming.

Rain, Sleep, and Blogs

I love rainy days.  Does anyone remember the song “I’m Only Happy When It Rains” by Garbage?  Totally like 15 years ago.  Whenever it rains, I think of that song.  A bit random, I know. 

Any who…. So, lately I’ve been having a hard time sleeping- not that any of y’all care- but between pain in my foot/leg/hip/back and Scott rolling all night, I’m pretty much Sleepless in Birmingham.  My solutions: (1) get a new mattress (2) get a king size bed (3) take pain medicine before I sleep or (4) drink Nyquil.  I’m thinking a mixture of  #3 or #4 would be the best solution.

So out of boredom I decided to read some random blogs of people I don’t know.  This is what I’ve learned.

·         People are boring, incredibly boring.

·         Most “active” blogs are either about someone getting married, having a baby, obsessed with an animal, or that random weirdo who likes to blog about nothing at all (like myself)

·         A lot of blogs are like Pinterest, but with words

·         There is this thing lately where bloggers fill out a questionnaire to get more followers…not sure what that’s  all about.

·         The blogs with custom-made banners are normally the most active. 

I don’t think my finding will solve world peace, but it’s a start.

On a side note my beloved coworker, Beth, will be moving to greener pastures in 2 weeks.  While I’ll miss her perfectly put together outfits, talking about Brittany Spears and baby names, and dreaming of planning kids’ parties together, I know her decision to leave is the right one.  But don’t you worry people, she has a fabulous blog- full of Pinterest pictures, a custom made banner, make up, fashion, and all things southern:  http://ourmillerhighlife.blogspot.com/

Another Apology

Ahh …yesss. I know, I know, I owe y’all another apology for the lack of a blog post. My regrets, truly.  You would think I am the only person to blame for slacking off….however, in true Jorgenson fashion, I am never at fault, so I’m going to list all others who are at fault:

1. Scott. Ever since he graduated, he has been studying nonstop for the NAPLEX and law exam. Thankfully, he passed them and is now a licensed pharmacist!! Since he was studying nonstop, the house was a bit quiet. Also, I figure that now since I'm married, I need to stop blaming my Mom for everything, so Scott, naturally, is the next in line.  I should also welcome Scott to the real world- full of computers, bosses, short lunches, and 280 traffic at 5pm.  His 1st office consists of a cubical with 2 computer monitors and a lifetime of work.

2. Dr. Kirchner for operating on my foot. Its been a month and 4 days The foot is healing well, thank you. And I have a new appreciation for people with disabilities (minus those with dyslexia).

ouch

3. My boss. I’ve been busy at work. You might want to reread what I just wrote because I’ll probably never write it again.

4. The lack of crossfit combined with Scott starting the Transformation Challenge. When I don’t work out, I'm not myself, thus, no blog. Today was my first day back to Iron Tribe, hopefully I'll be back to brand new in a few weeks! Scott started the transformation challenge last week. They are charting how much stronger he gets in 40 days and the winner get a prize. This means he has to eat 99% Paleo-so I’m in the kitchen (attempting) to cook. I’m going on about 50/50 that the meal is eatable.

5. My best friend, Katie Pauley. I've been busy hosting her a couples shower a few weekends ago and her Bachelorette party in 2 weeks. We're going to Hotlanta for her party... TeeTay (Taylor Vinson) and I have spent the better part of the last couple months planning it. I don't know what it is, but I love everything about wedding. Scratch that, I love everything about a party, regardless of the occasion.

Compliments of TeeTay

I can’t really use William as an excuse. He has been doing so many cute things that I could have blogged about. Ann sent me tons of photos of him in their pool. I may or may not have spent all day looking at them. He is a little pool rat (aka future Olympic swimmer).

Wet shirt + butt cut

Look at that chubby tummy.  So full of sugar I want to eat him up!

Well, I hope everyone has a wonderful week and I give you my word that I'll post more often!

Most spoiled dog- sleeping in her bed of goose down and silk pillows

4th of July 2012!

Happy 4^th of July!

This is one of my favorite holidays.  Not only do we get to celebrate America’s independence, but also you get to enjoy a day off work to cook out, eat apple pie, and watch fireworks!! What more could someone ask for?  For over 20 years, every 4^th of July my family would fly up to North Dakota to have a family reunion and celebrate my grandfather’s (Boppy) birthday.  Ever since Boppy got sick and passed, we haven’t done this, which always makes me a bit sad on July 4^th because I remember all the fun memories I had as a kid- fishing, tubing, jet skiing, eating burgers, and taking pontoon rides.  I cannot wait to re-start the family reunion soon!  

This July 4^th, Scott will be studying for his Alabama Pharmacy Law test, which will be on Thursday, and I will be participating in the neighborhood’s Apple Pie Contest.  I know you’re jealous of our exciting plans!  In true Jane fashion, I have found a lope hole in the Apple Pie Contest rules and will be actually entering Scott’s grandfather’s (Papoose) pie.  He is an expert pie maker-his recipe is even a Leonelli family secret recipe!  I already know we’ll win.

Also this Thursday, I go to the orthopedic surgeon and get my foot cast removed!!!  Doc said, depending on the healing, he’ll probably put me in a walking boot.  One step closer to wearing normal shoes!

I hope everyone has a WONDERFUL and safe 4^th of July.  Can’t wait to see everyone’s pictures of being on the lake, eating corn on the cob, and enjoying fireworks!

Since the Foot Surgery

Things that have happened since my foot surgery (in no particular order):

-          I’ve discovered the reason why people were born with 2 legs.  After the first couple of days of playing with crutches and enjoying the fact that your husband is waiting on you hand and foot, you start to realize how inconvenient it is to be missing the use of one leg.  Most importantly, I miss running, crossfit, and vacuuming.

-         

-          Its been raining in Tampa all week but I’m not worried, because the 2 most important people in tampa, William and Lando (my coworker’s nephew), are better swimmers at the age of 2 than most people are in their entire life.  Nevertheless, I hope everyone is safe (and has flood insurance).

-          Probably one of the top 10 coolest coworkers ever, Bain Rumohr, is retiring from his life as a public servant, to pursue a career in the private sector.  While he, by himself, is only semi-cool, his family together elevates his rating to a top ten position.  His son, Wes, is a future NBA star.  His father looks like George W, and he and his brother look like Prince Harry and Prince William, respectively.  Yes, that does mean Bain looks like Prince Harry, which implies that he is a ginger.  Don’t judge- he is the coolest ginger I know.  

-          I have zero respect for anyone that uses the scooters at Wal Mart, unless they have legit medical reason to use one.  Being lazy is not an excuse.  That is all I can say on this topic.

-          My Grandfather-in-Law, Papoose, got to participate in the last Honor Flight out of Birmingham!  What an honor!  He served in WW2 and retired as a Lieutenant Colonel in the Air Force.  We welcomed him home at the Birmingham airport along with many other family members and friends of the veterans last week.  It was quite the experience and was humbled by the American spirit in each one of the veterans.   

-          During my time of laying in bed I’ve have the learning experience of watching my cat all day.  She sits on the bed and watches for lizards to crawl on the window, once on the window, Gigi attacks the lizard with her clawless paw on the glass and pretends to kill it.  This is repeated about 2-5 times a day, depending on the lizard’s appearance, of course.  Its pretty entertaining to watch...or maybe my standards for entertainment have declined.

Yup, that’s about all I’ve learned.  A huge thank you to my mom, Lisa, and Scott for taking care of me and helping out around the house!!  In just a few weeks I’ll be back in my Louboutins and Nikes!!